Good true friends.....

are really hard to find. Yesterday I was FBing with an old HS school friend and while we were doing this a bunch of bad information came up regarding a random old family friend who was just not there for her during her really hard time.  It got me thinking again how truly special true and blue friends are. You know the friends who are there for your through thick and thin, friends that don't becomes sociopath liars and friends you can have conversations with without having a heat on from happy hour. You know those friends. I have learned allot in the few years about people and have learned to be allot more cautious when bringing certain people into my life. It guess it helps that I am clearly thinking and no longer fogged over from the party scene that took over our lives for 10 years. I am now clear headed, healthier, stronger than I thought and definitely in the don't give a shit part of my life. If I got something to say you are going to hear it. I know for a fact that if paths were ever crossed again with certain acquaintances things would not be pretty in the vocal form of communication. So if you have that special true blue gal or guy in your life who has just been your rock and that person who has always been there for you let them know. Because people like that are true gems in our lives and must be truly cherished. I leave you with a post that I wrote a few months back. I decided to re post because I think we sometimes need to think about who is truly in our lives for the long haul or who is just renting space. Peace ladies and gents.

Quality over quantity any day.  I used to be vice versa just a few years ago. I felt the more “friends” I had around me the better.   I felt I needed a bunch of people around me in order to feel accepted. It was so high school it was ridiculous. As you grow up and get older you realize what the meaning of true friendship is. I discovered who I thought were friends of mine {and ours} were just really “acquaintances” at best.  I discovered that women I thought were sisters were actually just fakes – I know you’re like…… this is supposed to be about great friendships between women - I am getting to the point I swear.

I saw the true colors of these friends when the shit hit the fan – when my mom was diagnosed with stage 4 lung  cancer I saw the light.  I saw women who told me they would always be there for me and I thought were best friends run for the hills. No phone calls to see how my mom was doing, no support calls and just no calls. Even though some of these very friends were welcomed with open arms and homes when they had no were to go for holidays and such. I will always remember the hurt I felt, here I am going through the most painful thing ever and there was no one around. In a way it destroyed the little trust I had for women. My first emotion was to go after them with fists flying  but after calming down I decided they were just not worth the trouble and jail time. Through all this dark “muck”  I was going through at the time quite a few bright lights of hope flashed through and showed me what true friendships are supposed to be. I received phone calls from friends that I had lost contact with because of all the crap of hanging out with certain members of the “group". I got caught up in the bull shit, the bars and the  drama. 

These women checked on me and my well-being and they called to see if they could do anything for me and my fam. They were there when my mom passed away. They showed up at the wake they showed up when I placed mom in her resting place. They were there when I cried myself to sleep for months straight and refused to leave the house because I felt so lost. They were there when I picked up the phone every day to call my mom and realized she was no longer here. They took me out, they helped me out and finally I started to feel better.  One of my friends helped me build the crib and get the nursery ready when my hubby was too busy at work and I too prego to work the drill. She was there to help me with all the things I could not do because my big fat belly was in the way. I had a friends stay with me on the phone while I threw up on a daily basis while she reassured me that this holy hell was all normal. These friends threw me a baby shower and sent many welcomes when baby was born. These friends made the trip across the bridge to see my  little GG when she was first born. These friends have been around when I just needed a hug a glass of wine and a shoulder to cry on.  These to me are true friends, friends that are in your life that make you feel special and loved and that you matter.  There is only a handful in my life right now because I choose it to be that way. I would rather have a handful of really good jelly beans in a jar than a jar of so so jelly beans.

I love all of mine to pieces and you know who you are!  I have learned allot during my 41 42 years and the one thing I did learn is that truly good friends are hard to find…Show them some love and let them know how special they are.