Wednesday, May 16, 2012

The Charlotte Syndrome....

Everything is fine...All fine.....everything is fine
that is what I call it.  I am comparing this type to Charlotte from Sex and the City. In your world it could be a Betty, Lucy or a Heather to me it is the Charlotte. When I encounter this breed of woman it is hard for me to relate because I am not like this and I do not know what makes this person the way that she is.  You know the type my child is perfect, my child can do not wrong my child is the next *fill in the blank*. He/she doesn't cry, sleeps through the night,  already eating solid foods, walking as soon as he was born, can drive a car, got MBA, won Nobel Peace Prize yada...yada...yada.

Now as bad as SATC2 was I did watch it.  I love this part-

Ms. Charlotte is at the wedding and her hubby is stating that Rose is basically a complete nightmare and cries all the time you know being real about the situation and Charlotte interjects and is like...No...No she is just a little fussy  - as she shoots her hubby a death how could you possibly let our friends know that our child is not perfect?

Oh and I love this part even more

Ms. Charlotte is in her all white kitchen in her all white vintage Valentino outfit and heels let's not forget heels.....Instead of losing her shit like a regular mommy so her little ones don't see her "breakdown" she kinda freaks and locks herself in the pantry to cry because one of her demon seeds gets red frosting all over her white outfit {pfft} and her baby just cries and cries and is just plain annoying.  But instead of venting to her friend Carrie and just letting lose like a normal mommy she decides to run and lock herself away. I know that she probably did this not to have her kids see her breakdown but you know what girl sometimes you need to show your emotions to your children and show them your not perfect because NO ONE and I mean NO ONE is perfect no matter how hard you try and portray that you are.  BTW Heels in the kitchen is stupid {my opinion} and anyone who does do it is looking for future major back problems and an accident. I do allot in heels but cooking is not one of them.

A Charlotte is the kind of mommy that makes you want to bash your head against the wall. Everything is a competition and the last thing you want to do is listen to all the bull shit or worse of all call them out on it. I am surrounded by allot of Charlotte's in my area.  I am super lucky that I found one play group were the moms are super cool, laid back and not annoying. I have noticed that the older I get the less patience I have for Charlotte's. I have begun to avoid the Charlotte's because of what could possibly shoot out of my mouth to offend a Charlotte.  I want to shake the Charlotte's and say to them...

  • Just because your kid is mellow now does not mean your kid will be like that forever chill the fuck out with telling people how good your kid is all the time it's annoying
  • Terrible 2's and 3's they happen to all kids yours will not be immune to it 
  • Once they taste walking freedom things will change - so enjoy those nice restaurants now 
  • Napping, eating, hanging out all those patterns change so when they don't "do" at exactly the same time as they have it means the child is growing an changing get used to it and get over it.
I have learned all these the hard way I had no one to help me out. At the time I was the only one in the group that had a kid so I could not compare notes. I only had the mommy acquaintances that I made through networking in the area and when you first come into a group it is hard enough then your confronted with The Charlotte's who make you feel like you don't measure up as a mother...I have now learned that Charlotte's are mommy's that will never show you the real them and everything around them is kind of a Alice in Wonderland effect and not exactly real. They put a show on for the camera. 

I have now gotten comfortable in my mother role. I am the first to admit that on some days I suck at it!  I am the first to tell you my kid is turning into an a**hole and that she drives me completely batty and her listening skills is like talking to a wall.  I cuss allot, I watch waay to much reality TV and I read garbage magazines. But you know what I am doing the best that I can with what I have. I give her tons of love and make her feel as special as I can everyday. After all I want to raise an excellent kid not a perfect one. 

Mother of the Year 


joeh said...

When I used to hear all that baby bragging, sleeping through the night, never cries, eats everything, yada yada yada, I would just say, "you are really lucky, it must be easy raising a turnip!"

Ok I never said that, but I thought it!


Ronni said...

I LOVE it when I see an honest momma posting. :) That's why I adore your blog so much.

Mommy Does Everything said...

Its like your reading my mind today !! Just got off the phone with a gf about another one of our gf that is JUST like what you said . We went out fri night and OMG !! Its very annoying and like you I could never be like that ! and sometimes i sit there anfd listen like ok Maybe I am wrong here but i know I am not.

KERRY said...

I am more like Miranda lol
I totally agree with you :)
You keep it real which is why I keep coming back!

Mommy Bags said...

Thanks gals I will always tell you how it there any other way?

Caffeinated OC Mommy said...

You're perfect Darling... just the way you are... xoxo

ana said...

Love.It. ...and totally true! I've hung out with the "Charlotte" type and just don't understand them... like I'm really going to judge if they're not raising perfect angels and farting out rainbows.

Feeling the love......