Tuesday, July 31, 2012


The other day I  realized I was getting old when the clerk at the Trader Joes's referred to me as ma'am. Ma'am...Ma'am are you friggin kidding me!*banging head on table*.   To me the term ma'am is not a term of politeness but when a young tight thing just thinks your over the hill.  I have been told I don't look my age and have gotten compliments on my skin which is always a positive. I regularly facial, I moisturize every am and every pm. I never ever go to bed with my make up on...no matter how much partying I did in my young age and the minor bit I do today.   I will not go to bed with make up. That is just nasty and will f*ck up your skin... listening young chic a D's?   I use 3-6-9 essential fatty oils, a neck tightening cream and don't let me get started on the eye creams......but with all that I do to keep the face young and fresh when someone calls you ma'am your self esteem takes a hit.  The shitty part of getting old is that you may not feel it but the almighty body has a whole different agenda. As you look in the mirror you realize that shit is not as tight as it used to be and shit is not going back as quickly as it used to no matter how hard you work out. You begin to think your face is falling and will never get back up again. Just thumbing through fashion magazines can bring on an anxiety attack and just the overall plastic surgery worship we are surrounded by will make you crazy. My husband has made it perfectly clear - I come home with botox injected anywhere on my  face and we are going to have issues. My husband does not lay the law down often but when he does I listen and that one is a BIGGY to him. He does not like what botox/PS has done to some women and he cannot understand how everyone wants to look the same?  We were not put on this world to look like everyone else.   I personally think some of these women are beginning to look like wax museum statues.  In a way I am super stoked I have a man in my life who loves me for me.

So I am taking the natural route and last night I started to do Face Yoga. I heard about this through some articles I was reading and in the spa circuit. So I decided why not try what do I have to lose - - right? Now I looked like a total asshole doing this last night but you know what this am my face felt like I had given it a serious work out. So maybe just maybe this shit might work???? Who knows but it is a fact that this country is OBSESSED and I do mean OBSESSED with looking young. Their is no way I would ever want to look like the plastic rejects of Real Housewives of the OC or some of these women who are between the ages of 40-48 who still dress like tweens and pick up their clothes at the same shops their  daughters shop at. I want to age with class and not trash. I don't want to look young I want to look rested.

Below are the exercises I started doing in the evening before I apply my magic potions and lotions. Yes...I look this much of an asshole.

facial yoga

facial yoga

facial yoga


joeh said...

Ma'am? That is nothing. Wait til the first birthday when sombody says "So, your humpty-hump years YOUNG today!"

Fuck You!! Years young... why not just friggin start throwing dirt on me?

cranky old man

Andrea said...

Would you feel better knowing that someone called my 12 year old daughter ma'am today when trying to let her know the sidewalk paint was wet? She said she didn't turn the first couple of times because she didn't think he was talking to her!

Sarah @ It's a Vol said...

I get called ma'am all the time. I'm 29. That should make you feel better. Also can we please have pics of you doing face yoga? Oh, pretty please! ;)

Cyn Knight said...

yeah getting ma'am'd SUCKS!!!!
and at trader joe's no less!

i am with ya though... i would rather look old than like the cookie cutter over botoxed/PS'd freak-a-zoids out there!


Mommy Bags said...

No photos of face yoga will be posted that is just crazy talk...lol

Chris said...

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Susan said...

I'm going to start face yoga every day. I know when I lose weight, all the wrinkles will appear. That might be why I'm still fat. Just trying to fill out the wrinkles! LOL My face might fall off when I lose all the weight.

Feeling the love......