Monday, April 22, 2013

Friends......

In the last few weeks there have been some really disturbing stories in the news....Besides the many violent acts from the human race we have been bombarded with awful stories of young women taking their own lives over the bullying they received via social networks by "friends". I don't understand this and I don't understand why some young adults feel the need to do this to each other? What kind of perverse thrill do you get to do this to one of your fellow classmates someone you grew up with? I bring this subject up because in the last few weeks it has been one girl after another killing themselves over the 24/7 harassment and bullying received by classmates over the not so nice pics that hit the social wave. The latest case was of a local girl here in N.Calif. that killed herself 10 days after a local house party because of the bullying she received on line. Below is the whole story which is horrifying, tragic and just wrong.
http://www.mercurynews.com/breaking-news/ci_23047587/audrie-pott-case-school-responds-allegations-it-ignored
I have a daughter and stories like this keep me up at night. I am also not as understanding as this mother is. I do not know if I could control what I would do to these three boys if I got a hold of them. At that point I would have nothing to lose. But hey that is me.

I also want to know where were her friends? All I know is all teenagers experiment with liquor at some point during their young lives.....this is nothing new. I however question why a 15 year old was left home alone with an open liquor cabinet while parents went up  Napa for a weekend with no one left in charge?  Are you insane!?!  Listen up little GG that shit is not going to fly in this house your mama was not a hermit but a party-er so she knows exactly what the 411 is. I am here to be your parent NOT your friend.  I feel that surrounding yourself with true good friends is a huge importance during these tough young adult years. They should have kept an eye out for her. They knew she was passed out upstairs they should have made sure she was ok.

When I hear stories like this it flashes me back to my senior year in HS. All I remember is that if I had not been watched by my friends who knew what could have happened that night.  I had pretty strict Italian family. I was watched like a hawk for years and it someways it was great and in other ways not so much. I rebelled in the way I dressed, spoke and did some things. I never pushed it too far becasue it was hard to "get over" on my parents. I was a pretty good OK girl in HS because of the respect I had for my parents. I also was super scared shitless of my dad. He was and is still to this day an awesome father but it was made perfectly clear that at his house it was his way or the highway.  My senior year of HS and we were having a last night senior thing I do not even remember what it was officially called but it was going to be fun.  Of course their was liquor that is just the facts of life my friends. I do not know of a single person who has not had a liquor experience in HS or for that matter Junior high....I was given permission to stay out late...now mind you I was 17 going on 18. I was excited to spend some time with friends as well as excited that HS was finally Ova".  We all got together hung out downtown at the Pier and we did a bunch of stuff we thought was pretty cool back then -  hey it was the 80's after all. At some point and I do not know where or how but we got a hold of some beer and hard liquor. At this point I proceeded to partake in the beverages of choice. We decided to head to the Cliffs by the Ocean. I remember having a great time no worries in the world and just care free teenager.  At that point a group of us went to the local grocery store and in the parking lot we picked up some random man not a boy a man.  I would say he was in his late 20's. That is something that was done in the 80's picking up strangers in parking lots yep sounds safe doesn't it...nope not so much but hey we thought he was cute....or I kinda of remember that he was cute. At that point I was feeling no pain and I was ready to go. I was 17 out for the evening...not new to alcohol but new to this much alcohol and I was toasted in a fun way. I believe their might have been 15 of us total and we decided to bring this man with us. I do not know at what point I went from happy drunk to WTF holy shit the rocks were spinning I am going to pass out drunk. The funny part is I do not remember drinking a whole bunch but enough to give me a buzz but at some part during the evening I got really fuzzy..... like weirdly FUZZY. Now at this point I knew that I was totally up shit creek because I was so very late getting home and I was drunk..... what the hell was I going to tell my parents? I kept asking to be brought home {my friends told me the story the next morning they told me this man was very adamant on wanting to give me a ride home} almost to the point of pulling me away from my group in order to get me into his vehicle to take me home. My friends had a bad feeling about this guy and they made sure they were there to take care of me in my drunken stupor. I was extremely lucky that I had the friends like my friends during that night. They watched him and they made sure to tell him time and time again that my friends were going to take me home and to leave me alone. They went as far as to fake pose in front of his car to get description of the vehicle as well as the license plate just in case we did not have cell phones then it was done with an old fashioned camera. I was finally taken home by my awesome group of friends I believe via taxi...I do remember that I threw up on the way home outside the cab of course. It was awful to feel like that I was young and dumb. One of my friends called the next morning and told me she believed that I was slipped something in my beer because she did not remember me drinking that much ...not to the level of how messed up I was. One particular friend - and you know who you are saved my life that night and for that I would ever be grateful. If I had not had the group of friends that I had that night I could have become a statistic and just the though of that sends shivers up my spine.

As women we need to watch out for each other.....To this day anytime we go out none of us leave one another in a bar. And when we get home we text one and another to make sure we got home safely. It is so sad and tragic to me that some these young adults do not have the same values to watch out for one another but they in turn would rather take photos/videos and break each other down. What does that say for the future of our country and their souls?



3 comments:

ana said...

I think these same things... I don't understand kids/people these days... where were her friends? I think back to all the times my friends have saved my ass and feel lucky to have them? ...you are very lucky to have had yours as well.. Such a scary situation to have had yourself in when looking back!

Not Winning Mom of the Year said...

Agreed it is sad, but it is such a different time from when I was young. I feel like its getting worse, people are more daring, each trying to push the limit further. I know your taking from a girls taking care of girls perspective, but I think parents should do better with raising boys. Boys lack better judgment, succumb to more peer pressure and rarely suffer the same extent of consequences.

Im A Silly Mami said...

So heart breaking. With social media up our asses you really do need your true friends. My mother was the strict one, just lime your dad so we didn't get too crazy but wr had our friends and watched each others back.

Our daughters are the same age and it scares the living shit out of me of what's to come. I am her mother first and if anyone did harm to my child like that you better pray that you never come in contact with me because Lord help you.

Its so sad

Irene

Feeling the love......